Today, I have talked about a friend of a friend.
Whether it be about boys staying over, noise levels around exam time, or people not pulling their weight in the house, much of the rants with coursemates concerns housemate issues. It's hard to handle housemate hassles at home without causing tension, so it often seems sensible to let off steam to people who aren't directly affected. It's weird though, learning about these people from a third person perspective. I could name every one of my friends' housemates, despite the fact that I've only met a handful of them, and even then, it's generally only in passing. Yet I know intimate details about their annoying habits, and the type of person they are. In many cases, I've judged before I've even got to know them, based purely on what I've heard. If ever I were to have more than a polite exchange with someone, having already gathered so much information and formed opinons from from odd anecdotes, would it change the way I see them?
Do you ever wonder how much other people talk about you? I do. Overly self-centred perhaps, because people have their own life and friends and plenty of other people to discuss. But since I, myself, am often caught in conversations about people I don't tend to actually speak to, I can't help but imagine what might have been said about me to other people, who knows what and how much they know...?
The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about
~ Oscar Wilde
On the jukebox: Hilary Duff ~ Wake Up
Whether it be about boys staying over, noise levels around exam time, or people not pulling their weight in the house, much of the rants with coursemates concerns housemate issues. It's hard to handle housemate hassles at home without causing tension, so it often seems sensible to let off steam to people who aren't directly affected. It's weird though, learning about these people from a third person perspective. I could name every one of my friends' housemates, despite the fact that I've only met a handful of them, and even then, it's generally only in passing. Yet I know intimate details about their annoying habits, and the type of person they are. In many cases, I've judged before I've even got to know them, based purely on what I've heard. If ever I were to have more than a polite exchange with someone, having already gathered so much information and formed opinons from from odd anecdotes, would it change the way I see them?
Do you ever wonder how much other people talk about you? I do. Overly self-centred perhaps, because people have their own life and friends and plenty of other people to discuss. But since I, myself, am often caught in conversations about people I don't tend to actually speak to, I can't help but imagine what might have been said about me to other people, who knows what and how much they know...?
The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about
~ Oscar Wilde
I think about this a lot actually. Mostly, I assume that what people say about me is harmless, and that other people would take it with a pinch of salt.
ReplyDeleteIn the last few months I found out that my housemates had been spreading pretty vicious tales about me, which was horrible to learn.
And more recently, someone passed on what a vague acquaintance had said about me, which I really didn't want to know. Sometimes it's best to not know what people are saying!
On the other hand, my friend's boyfriend told me the nice things she'd said about me, and it made my day :)
It crosses a lot of people's minds, I think - people want to know how they are perceived. If for no other reason, I'd like to know so that if I do something really annoying I can try and change things, rather than continuing blissfully but irritatingly unawares. Better to know, hurtful or not, I think.
ReplyDeleteThis is going to sound ridiculous but I used to be under the impression that I wasn't talked about. I'm not sure what made me so invicible and on the high moral ground to believe this but I really did. I think I probably thought I wasn't the type of person who did things to warrant being talked about. Stupid girl, huh?!
ReplyDeleteI eventually realised that if I'm talking about people chances are they've talked about me.
I agree with Callan, better to know however hurtful it might be.