It makes me smile stupidly to have people refer to me as a name they have given me, rather than the one I introduced myself as. It's a bit strange, I think, to force your nickname on people. Nicknames should develop, and left to circumstance, inevitably they will. Often, I feel I place too much emphasis on the concept of names, there is so much I could say on this subject, but in all honesty, I do think it makes a real difference in the way people perceive you. It shows a sense of closeness and connection if someone creates a special name, a reference to a running joke or shared incident.
At school, one drama lesson, we were discussing stereotypes. We had to each go up and strike a pose of a stereotypical type of person, and the rest of us would give a name to that person, one that we thought suited the kind of character they were portraying. It's funny, how the same sort of names would come up, or that people would agree on the name that the person could feasibly be called, based on nothing more than a silent, still image. The fact is, certain people do suit particular names, and as much as I'd like to pretend it's not true - I do form preconceptions based soley on a name.
There's so much to be gathered from a name. The area you're from, your parents' background, how pretentious you seem, how common you come across, how traditional, how quirky. Of course, there's exceptions, but for initial impressions, a name holds a lot of influence in introductions. You could say it's something you're born with, but there's always the option for flexibility or sublte alternation. Do you greet new people with the mention of your full name, or would you say the nickname that everyone knows you by? Is it weird for people to assign their own nickname, is it not something that evolves naturally? A pretty name for a pretty person? (A cheesy chat-up line for a cheeky chap...?)
One aspect of name-types that amuses me is hyphenated first names or double-barrelled surnames. How would you see Mary-Kate if she were just plain Kate or Mary. Or how about Jonty Wright-Smith? John Smith just doesn't give the same impression, yet they could easily be the same person. The thing about hyphenation is that it's a choice. It's not just the name you're christened with or a surname by default, to a certain degree you could choose how you wish to be perceived, and it's interesting to observe the way different people prefer to present themselves.
Personally, I wouldn't like to have a name that is identical to 1 in 20 other girls, a name is not just a label, it's a description of self and I know, that if I were known by a different name, I don't think I would act the same, or be treated the same. Some people make think it's kind of weird to place so much emphasis on names - surely it's the person inside that counts?
On the jukebox: The Ting Tings ~ That's Not My Name
A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure that doesn't contradict what you've said despite the name we're still the same person? But maybe I don't know what I'm on about. ;o)
Names are hugely important but I think they just are labels too, in some respect. I don't think there are many people that play up to their name, not consciously at least, though I may be wrong. I mean, you don't choose your own name, its something given to you by your parents - whether it's a name they've liked for many years or a name they thought *suited* you when you're born, you didn't choose it.
That said I suppose that's why we have nicknames, maybe it's out attempt to stamp our own personality to our name. But then, other people do the same.
Names are cultural and I like that variation they give us but I think the same name can be applied to different people and you'll have a different idea of what that name *is*.
Hmm, can't say I'm making much sense but maybe the essense is getting through :o)
xxx
"How would you see Mary-Kate if she were just plain Kate or Mary. Or how about Jonty Wright-Smith? John Smith just doesn't give the same impression"
ReplyDeleteCourse, certain parts of the population are much more likely to give their kids certain names than other parts. I guess you're much more likely to find Tarqin Baron McSnootyface at Eton (because Mummy and Daddy have lots of money. And are probably evil, if they give their kid that name...) than you will at Crapton Comprehensive ("10% of our students get A GCSE!").
Theres a survey done somewhere about the most popular names over the last 100 years, it's really interesting. I guess if you sorted popular names by where the people with those names live (or come from, anyway), you'd get some equally interesting results.
As for nicknames, I use my nickname online, but I don't really introduce myself to people as it. That's for other people to do.
I don't mind 'Lucy', but I'm not sure that it's done me huge amounts of favours over the years. I don't like my middle name or my surname, though (and I will leave those for me to know and the internet to ignore). The one thing that I can't stand is when 'Lucy' gets shortened to 'Luce', although I guess it's a mark of informality - one of my housemates has got into the habit recently and while it's nice that she feels that she knows me well enough to do so without thinking about it, it still grates a little!
ReplyDelete'Lu', on the other hand, is what close family and close family friends call me. One such friend got Facebook the other day and addressed me as 'Lu' on my wall, which made me go all warm and fuzzy and home-loved inside :-)
Names do matter.
(Talking of which, it occurs to me that most of us don't know your name unless 'Flix' is the obvious shortening. One more complication to internet friendships.)
I've taken to thinking of Flix as a shortening of Felicity, which while likely to be completely off the wall in so far as accuracy is concerned makes you slightly more of a person I can conceive of as residing in the 'real world' rather than just on the web. I find online nicknames don't have the punch to make a person real, whereas even a fake name has the power to insert a person into the real.
ReplyDeleteI'd say that you are the same rose regardless of the name, but the smell changes with the name. To collapse that rather obscure and badly executed metaphor, the name doesn't change the person but it changes the life around the person in terms of how they are perceived. Of course, some names will cause significant life changes, but these names are rare and generally only bestowed by celebrities on their hapless children =)
Flix is a truncated version of Flitterbee. My parents were hippies ;o)
ReplyDeleteI'm not really real. I only exist online.