It's been a weird week. Full of dates, mates, dangling bait and staying up late.#
First of all, the best football match I've ever been to. That is, the only football match I've ever been to. As I have lamented and rejoiced in before, many of my friends are now boys. Lads who do laddish things like drink beer and watch football. So I went to watch the football with my merry men. It was quite an experience. After the match, we walked home. Most of it was along the canal, and it was lovely and picturesque and romantic and if only one of the boys was A Boy that I wanted to be with, rather than just Friends who I go to the football with. Hey ho.
Next up, a cinema date that was not a date. That is, two colleagues going to see a film together because it's Orange Wednesday and they are the only ones that wish to see that particular movie. The only snag being the mismatch of sentiment between the two. However, the jury came to the conclusion that it was indeed a Just As Friends meet, and not a More Than Friends date. This involved tears, because rejection - even when implict rather than outright - is brutal, but better than the torture of never knowing. Ah well.
So to follow, there was a course social. Involving boys. And when there are boys, there is confusion, there is rarely a way to avoid that. So there were kisses that did not mean what they were supposed to, and inappropriate looks that made for uncomfortable conversations. In the mix was some harmless texting that would perhaps become hurtful, and so by the very act of remaining secret became a malicious act, despite the fact that it was completely innocent. Oh dear.
The rest of the week proceeded in much a similar manner, regarding boys and girls, unrequited feelings, dashed hopes and missed opportunities. An inbalance of attraction: that's what it boils down to in the end. I'm undecided on the whole cross-gender close friendship idea. I think it can work well as part of a mixed group but on a one-to-one basis, only in specific cases. Or perhaps it can work, I just don't think I've ever experienced it myself. Hmm.
In other news: I still have no cake.
On the jukebox: Eels ~ Hey Man (Now You're Really Living)
Aha! It's tricky and can only ever happen in crazily rare situations (as I demonstrated in the last post).
ReplyDeleteOtherwise, the feelings have a habit of getting in the way which is why if you are determined to have a friendship rather than a relationship with a boy you need to learn the art of supression.
Which I am aware is in no way healthy but is a fact of life.