Research is dull. It's not all world changing and 90% of the time is spent working out what went wrong in the other ten percent. Reactions rarely go as expected, such is the nature of research: there are no definite answers. And you could end up with a fascinating result. Or you could end up with nine months of nothing.
Last year, labs used to be largely about laughs with your mates, among other benefits. Now, labs are rubbish again. Not particulary difficult or strenuous just downright frustrating and tedious. Most of the time it doesn't work and when it does, it's just annoying that it took so long, it barely even warrants the satisfaction that should come with success.
I feel like a first year. I have colleagues, but colleagues aren't friends. They are people you have to spend your days with. And half the time we spend in silence on adjacent computers. There's a lot of waiting around. Waiting for reactions to run, waiting for analysis to come, waiting to press a button at the right time before the world implodes. Or something less severe. There's a lot of waiting around and not a lot of conversation.
That's the difference, I suppose. Undergraduate labs still involved a lot of waiting around, but there was always people, always conversation. It was okay to ask questions, it was okay to talk to your friends, it was okay not to know exactly what you're supposed to be doing. Now, I am a frequent face in at least three different laboratories and I only know a handful of people who I pass on a daily basis. And while there's people I smile at, or have a corridor chat with from time to time, there's far more that I wouldn't so much as make eye contact with, despite the fact that we both know we see each other around all the time. How are you supposed to talk to strangers without the wonderful aid of alcohol? How do you infiltrate the cliques that have so clearly built up their closed circuits that anyone attempting to break in by striking up a menial conversation would be seen as a freak, a weirdo, someone who has no friends of their own, so tries to befriend anyone. What the hell are you doing here? You don't belong here.
I'm not a buzzing socialite, I prefer to have a few close friends. Sometimes, I do just like to sit and think and not have to make small talk with everyone I meet. But sometimes, it gets tiresome just speaking to the same two or three people. Sometimes, I wouldn't mind being able to just chat with someone I don't know that well about nothing in particular. Or just an acknowledgement of some sort.
As much as I hate to admit it, alcohol tends to be the key to building those bridges. Not that I have to drink it, of course, but if it helps me pretend like I'm less of an oddball for just wanting to say hi, then I'll play along. And it works, for an evening. After that, it goes back to 'normal' because without the atmosphere and the alcohol to mask themselves, everyone's too scared to reach out.
On the jukebox: S Club 7 ~ Bring It All Back
Last year, labs used to be largely about laughs with your mates, among other benefits. Now, labs are rubbish again. Not particulary difficult or strenuous just downright frustrating and tedious. Most of the time it doesn't work and when it does, it's just annoying that it took so long, it barely even warrants the satisfaction that should come with success.
I feel like a first year. I have colleagues, but colleagues aren't friends. They are people you have to spend your days with. And half the time we spend in silence on adjacent computers. There's a lot of waiting around. Waiting for reactions to run, waiting for analysis to come, waiting to press a button at the right time before the world implodes. Or something less severe. There's a lot of waiting around and not a lot of conversation.
That's the difference, I suppose. Undergraduate labs still involved a lot of waiting around, but there was always people, always conversation. It was okay to ask questions, it was okay to talk to your friends, it was okay not to know exactly what you're supposed to be doing. Now, I am a frequent face in at least three different laboratories and I only know a handful of people who I pass on a daily basis. And while there's people I smile at, or have a corridor chat with from time to time, there's far more that I wouldn't so much as make eye contact with, despite the fact that we both know we see each other around all the time. How are you supposed to talk to strangers without the wonderful aid of alcohol? How do you infiltrate the cliques that have so clearly built up their closed circuits that anyone attempting to break in by striking up a menial conversation would be seen as a freak, a weirdo, someone who has no friends of their own, so tries to befriend anyone. What the hell are you doing here? You don't belong here.
I'm not a buzzing socialite, I prefer to have a few close friends. Sometimes, I do just like to sit and think and not have to make small talk with everyone I meet. But sometimes, it gets tiresome just speaking to the same two or three people. Sometimes, I wouldn't mind being able to just chat with someone I don't know that well about nothing in particular. Or just an acknowledgement of some sort.
As much as I hate to admit it, alcohol tends to be the key to building those bridges. Not that I have to drink it, of course, but if it helps me pretend like I'm less of an oddball for just wanting to say hi, then I'll play along. And it works, for an evening. After that, it goes back to 'normal' because without the atmosphere and the alcohol to mask themselves, everyone's too scared to reach out.
On the jukebox: S Club 7 ~ Bring It All Back
Strange. Most of my really close friends at uni are friends because we were co-workers first - or, I should say, we were in the theatre first. And then we saw each other at our most overenthusiastic and jubilant times and when we were grumpiest and most sleep-deprived, and we got pretty close because we'd started off working towards the same things. Everything starts off being difficult, it's the nature of getting to know people - but hang on in there because if you're working together at the same things, chances are when you know each other better you'll find you have a similar attitude towards things as some of them. I don't know. Hugs. (Also jukebox win.) x
ReplyDeleteI will never stop my love for S Club 7.
ReplyDeleteSometimes we allow ourselves to become stuck in a rut. Only we can get ourselves out of it. Take a deep breathe and venture that first comment.