I used to think I had to have a reason, or a theme. I used to think I was saying too much, or too little. I started to get embarrassed about what I was writing, self-conscious about what I was saying, thought it wasn't helping me or anyone else. My sentences are too short, my content is too trite, my choice of words is too limited, the structure felt too forced. I used to think I included too many I's in each entry. I often felt like I was just repeating myself, someone else. I used to think that mattered.
I used to like blogging a lot. Daily, sometimes twice or thrice within the same 24 hours.
Now, I like looking back on my online past. I sort of want that again, but you can't go back. Most of my favourite blogs have moved on. And so have I.
January is tough. February is hopeful.
I think too much, you know.
Flitterbox: David Bowie ~ As The World Falls Down
I think that's the one thing that keeps me blogging- to have something to look back on. The rest of it - the actual words and pictures, the community around blogging - is secondary to that one thing.
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