Today, I turned twenty-five.
This blog spot was first titled Turning Twenteen. How long ago was that!? Crazy.
I find birthdays somewhat stressful, so I prefer that people are less likely to make a fuss as you get older, it's kind of a relief. It is the third consecutive birthday that I have not had summer exams and that still makes me mildly gleeful. Imagine! People are studying, while I casually eat a full grilled breakfast with old friends, followed by a leisurely coffee and chat. I am my own person, I pay my own way and I can choose how to spend my day. How very splendid and grown-up is that? How cool is it to be able to go away on holiday abroad with your friends? How awesome is it to be able to stay up late and go out when you want and drink alcohol and drive places and visit people and earn money? So the responsibility of being an adult sucks sometimes, but some parts are kind of ace, really.
The prologue of Paper Aeroplanes mentions nostalgia of going over teenage diaries, and how she wishes she hadn't stopped writing in hers at the age of 16. Sometimes I think that about my blog. I really like being able to click back in time to my mood on a given month of years gone by. Sadly, there's been less material available more recently and while I'd love to say something slightly smug about being too busy to blog, or that I'm out living my life rather than writing about my thoughts, it wouldn't be true. I also am aware that many of the blogs I used to visit are also not really updated anymore and people probably aren't coming by here all that often either and I don't blame you for that since I don't really know what I'm supposed to write about these days and without the entries to read in return, it's difficult to find the motivation. That, and I'm kind of concerned about my blog becoming a therapeutic tool, rather than offering anything useful to the world wide web. In itself, that isn't the worst thing, but I'm not sure repetitive introspection is necessarily a good idea.
Then I just get all concerned about having not written anything in a while and decide what seemed like a good way to start a sentence ends up with a few paragraphs that haven't really said much new. But it's my birthday and I can't not blog about that! A whole year older, weird. I feel like I'm stagnating slightly, my twenty-fifth year has had it moments and like I said, being a grown-up is kind of cool sometimes and also sometimes really confusing and hard.
Someone tell me what to do with myself? Literally, any serious suggestions are honestly welcome. Answers in the comment box below. Cheers!
Flitterbox: 4 Non Blondes - What's Up
Flitterbook: Paper Aeroplanes - Dawn O'Porter - still a teenager at heart.
What to do with yourself with regards to what? Blogging, life, career, boys? Not that I have any answers, but still...! x
ReplyDeleteAnything. Everything. Direction. Suggestion. Except probably more leaning towards life and making a living kind of related things. Any ideas? I realise such an open-ended question is not ideal in order to offer helpful pointers, but anything you have about things that someone who is not all that happy with the way things are should do are welcome.
ReplyDeleteI'd always say work experience. If you think there's an outside chance you might enjoy doing something, try and get some experience doing that thing. Whatever that might be - you can always find someone who'll be willing to let you shadow them around doing what they do, be that teaching or becoming a politician or a photographer or something in healthcare or whatever - find the time to just try it out. If you don't try, you'll never know.
ReplyDeleteI really would say try the teaching thing. I didn't know what to expect, but I loved it - and from what little I know of you in person, I can see you doing that, I think :). But yeah, that's my thinking :). Does that help at all?