Foamy Fun

Today, I have been to a foam party.

It was so soapy, sweaty, smelly, soggy, snowy, silly, steamy, swampy, slippy, sticky, squelchy.

I surived - soaked to the skin, but still smiling. Surprising.

On the jukebox: Wet Wet Wet ~ Love Is All Around - Classic

Crime Watch

Today, I have witnessed a shoplifting incident.

I saw him do it. I saw him take it off the shelf, eyes darting about the place, watching to see if anyone was looking; if anyone would notice; if anyone would care. I saw him holding it out of view. He looked at me. I gave him a dirty look. I saw him take it, hide it and leave. I saw this all. I didn't do anything about it.

I am a bad citizen.

Alright, so it was worth less than a pound. Alright, so it was a only bottle of coke. Alright, so it was at a small open-plan chain-name bakery store with no doors and he probably would have been off on his bike before I even had the chance to pluck up the courage to mention it to someone, anyone. Alright, so I was only passing, I had no time to stop and consider. Alright, so these are unexcusable excuses. I should have done something, told someone, I'm sure. But I let it slide. I had hands full of shopping, a tired mind and heavy heart and if I'm honest, I couldn't be bothered with the hassle. So I let him get away with it.

I witnessed a crime. I let him get away with it.

What would you have done?

On the jukebox: Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds ~ People Ain't No Good

Promiscuous Girl

Today, I have been immersed in immorality.

I'm pretty sure, that somewhere, there are people who can have monagomous long term relationships. There have been instances I've come across where long distance doesn't mean "treat as if single". I know, despite clear evidence to the contrary, that for some girls, loyalty and respect is important in their close friendships with other girls. I'm pretty sure that somewhere, these people do exist.

However, if there does exist such concepts, it sure as hell don't seem the case from where I'm sitting. There is a huge chasm between what I experience in surrounding situations and what I believe to be acceptable behavior.

slut n. A person, especially a woman, considered sexually promiscuous.

That seems to be quite true description of character for some people I know. However, the same people would take offence at being labelled as such.

Perhaps it isn't fair to be so blunt. Perhaps, it is hurtful. But the truth hurts, I know so. Perhaps, if one had been on the receiving end of infidelity, one would not be so blasé about continually cheating on one's partner. Perhaps, if one had ever had real friends, one would not be so blasé about screwing them over for a quick screw.

Oh, I despair at the state of society.

On the jukebox: Joe Dolce ~ Shaddap You Face

Poker Pal

Today, I have been poked.

Properly poked, that is, not electronically poked. I have also been grabbed, pinched, held and touched.

Don't touch me please,
I cannot stand the way you tease.

There's a level of familiarity that people allow among each other, social normality dictates many of these rules - if, for example, you don't know a person very well, you probably wouldn't touch their backside intentionally (alcohol-induced interactions aside.) Within close friends, obviously the idea of acceptability is altered to fit in with the unwritten yet universally understood code of conduct that governs relationships between people. We know we don't do that, but this is permitted, because we've evolved our relationship to such a point that we're both comfortable with it.

It makes me feel awkward, and I find it awfully annoying when certain people have little concept of personal space, or are unable to judge acceptable boundaries.

It's not always easy to know where the mark is, but generally most people recognise when they overstep it. Subtle signals in body language; an immediate recoil at unexpectedly intimate contact is usually enough to make most people see where to stop. The inability to interpret these almost imperceptible responses is a small sign of slight social retardation and when it comes down to it, it's probably part of the reason one might find it hard to form meaningful relationships with people.

On the jukebox: Garbage ~ I Think I'm Paranoid

Constant Confusion

Today, I have searched for The Answer.

Where do we find contentment?

I don't know.

On the jukebox: Orchestral Manoeuvers in the Dark ~ Joan of Arc

Melancholy Melodies

Today, I have felt before I thought.

It's incredible how the mind subconsciously makes connections that somehow bypass the brain and settle somewhere in the lower torso region. A yawning, aching sense that makes one long for what there used to be; a gap that is missing something which can't be found; a feeling that can't quite be placed or rationalised. I enjoy listening to music; I can appreciate music; I am affected by music, but some albums really hit me, hard, sometimes unexpectedly.

There are particular songs that these days, I can't listen to it without feeling like I'm being repeatedly punched in the chest while similtaneously being kneed in the stomach. It's a shame, especially if it's actually a really good album, unfortunately permanently branded with the memories of that time in my life. It sounds stupid and overemphatic, and it's only a few tunes that do have an real physical effect in that sense, brought on soley by the conditional reflex effect of the connection to the album, rather than simply an enhancement of what I may be feeling at that moment in time. Indeed, the songs themselves may be cheery, but even if I'm in a good mood, to listen to the music will inevitably and uncontrollably make me feel really uncomfortable.

Nostalgic pains of this kind often pass with time or if I turn off the stereo. Just like any kind of low feeling, it ebbs and flows, comes and goes. But right now, allowing myself to become absorbed in the melancholy melodies, fateful decisions and wistful reminiscence, it hurts. It really hurts.

On the jukebox: The Feeling ~ Strange

Ear Lender

Today, I have ticked the listening box.

I enjoy reading other people's blogs, I do always read the ones of people who comment here and there and more or less. But I don't always have much to say in addition to a subject that has been so succintly expressed in a blog entry of its own merit that to taint with my menial mutterings would be futile and unnecessary.

On the other side of the story, it may transpire that an entry sparks such an interest as to inspire me to construct my own creation on a similar theme, rather than clutter up the comment box with long and irrelevant references or opinions. Might as well publish them on my blog instead, point out my opinions, my views, my stance on things to the wider world web, y'all care greatly about what I think, I'm sure.

Sometimes, I wish there was a function on these blogspot type things for people to show they're listening. A nod of the head is well enough face to face; an 'mm, yeah, I understand' on the phone; kudos given on myspace; positive applause added for approval on a forum. But the only way to prove you've been here & heard that, is to leave a comment.

Truth is, there's not always much to add. Especially with multiple blog entries per day. Blogspots don't lend themselves easily to conversation or further discussion. There's not always much need for a response. While I know it will still get read, there's still a part of me that wants the concrete acknowledgement.

A display of confirmation that I've been heard is the main reason why I think a listening box would be a good plan, or something similar, along the lines of:

4 readers have listened to this entry.
3 readers have agreed with this entry.
2 readers have found this entry interesting.
1 reader has found this entry a complete waste of pixels.

You visit, you listen, you tick or nod or smile just to leave your mark, make us feel like we're not alone. Maybe if I could speak computer, I could coax a snazzy function like this out of webcode, alas, I am useless, so for now, there is no option but to stick with what's avaliable. And hope that people can find it in their hearts to continue to comment...

On the jukebox: Alice Deejay ~ Better Off Alone